Clever

• Feels like getting some work done…and so he is sitting down until the feeling passes.
• Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don’t generate a lot of interest.
• Standing on the front lawn with his pants down waiting for the Google Earth Car to drive by and take a photo .
• I HAVE NO NUMBERS IN MY PHONE PLEASE LEAVE UR NUMBERS..

• I am juz having a fcked up life..
• Sometimes I just want to run up to a stranger on the street and say….YOU ARE IT… and then run away.
• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
• If money does not grow on trees then why do banks have branches.

• If you can grow marijuana on Farm ville then sell it on Mafia Wars.
• If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle? Take two and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
• If you give a person a fish you feed them for a day …. teach a person to use facebook and they won’t bother you for weeks.
• A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.

• Have anybody noticed that the…lol…. symbol looks like a drowning guy…I bet he is not laughing out loud.
• Facebook could read his mind so he didn’t have to fill this out every time he thinks.
• If your relationship status says,….It’s complicated… that you should stop kidding yourself and change it to….Single….